


L778

by scatteringmyashes



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Alternate Universe - Theatre, Chronic Pain, Fluff, M/M, Trans Character, Trans Fenris, Trans Hawke, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-05
Updated: 2017-07-05
Packaged: 2018-11-28 04:24:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11410155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scatteringmyashes/pseuds/scatteringmyashes
Summary: Ever since his abusive relationship, Fenris has struggled with chronic pain that occasionally leaves him unable to so much as walk. He's used to dealing with it alone.Thing is, he doesn't have to.





	L778

**Author's Note:**

> This is a part of a longer fic I'm working on in which Fenris is a (lighting) electrician and James Hawke is an up and coming star. It doesn't reference much so everything should be clear, but let me know if it isn't. 
> 
> The title is a reference to one of the color systems used in lighting, in this particular case Lee 778. This is for day four and the theme was sloth/diligence. 
> 
> Also both Fenris and Hawke are trans.

When Fenris stood up and immediately collapsed on himself, burning pain shooting up his legs and making his fingers twitch, he knew that this was going to be a bad day.

“Fenris!” James cried out, suddenly much more awake now that they weren’t just trading sleepy kisses. He leapt out of bed and hovered by Fenris, not willing to touch him without consent. James Hawke was a good man like that. “Can I help you?” He asked. Fenris nodded and clung to him as he placed him back in bed. It was a little ridiculous how easily James picked up a fully grown man, even if Fenris was much shorter.

Now that he was paying attention, Fenris felt like his legs had been slow roasting all night. Figuratively, but nonetheless he was not going to be doing a great deal of walking in this condition. He grit his teeth, a few tears of frustrating threatening to escape. 

He was sick and tired of the pain, of the constant reminder that Danarius had once been part of his life and he could never be free, never be back to the person he once was. It was foolish, but he couldn’t help but think that James should leave him, that a rising star shouldn’t be saddled with an electrician with chronic pain and a chronic bad attitude, that -- 

James placed a gentle kiss to Fenris’ forehead. “Whatever you’re thinking, it’s not true. I love you.” There was a moment of silence. “Do you want the heating pad and tea?” 

“I have to go in,” Fenris protested, though it was halfhearted at best. He was currently doing strike for _The Archon and I_ , which he had complained to no end about during the entire process. James, who had only seen clips from the show, still understood why Fenris hated it so much. As such, it wasn’t great if Fenris couldn’t work but it wouldn’t be the most important thing he had ever missed.

“I can call them for you,” James offered.

“No. I -- I should attempt --”

“Fenris. You are the strongest, bravest man I know. But you are not going anywhere. You couldn’t even stand. Please let me take care of you.” James’ eyes were wide as he pleaded with his boyfriend. The fact that he only wanted to help, that he did this not so Fenris would owe him but because he cared, was what convinced Fenris to sigh and nod.

“Very well.”

James’ smile was nothing like the one he pasted on for adoring fans or noisy reporters. It was pure and better and more blinding than any light Fenris has ever seen. It was just one of the reasons Fenris was in love with him.

“I’m going to grab your meds and the heating pad, ok?” James only waited for Fenris to nod before leaving, though he did press another kiss to Fenris’ forehead. A blush did not make its way on Fenris’ face. Definitely not. 

He let out a deep sigh as he groped across the bed for James’ pillow. His fingers felt the soft case and he threw it over his face. Breathing in, he was almost able to distract himself from the pain in his legs with the comforting scent of James’ crappy shampoo and general musk.

It was kind of pathetic, Fenris knew, to get such reassurance from a pillow. But he also knew that James would find it endearing rather than sad. James had made it clear from day one that anything Fenris wanted or needed, he could have. That was something Fenris was still getting used to having. 

James’ acceptance did not change the fact that Fenris was a fully grown man reduced to lying in bed while his boyfriend took care of him. 

“Back. I put some water on for tea too.” James pressed his lips to Fenris’ this time and one of Fenris’ hands came up to tangle in James’ hair. It was reaching his neck and needed to be cut soon, but for now he relished in the feeling of the soft strands between his fingers. “Ok, ok, I gotta take care of you first,” James half-protested when he finally pulled away. Fenris rolled his eyes but did not fight as the heating pad was placed on his legs and James gave him the pill bottle. 

“Thank you,” Fenris said, swallowing a few pills dry. He needed to eat something with them but his appetite was nonexistent. “You have an audition today?” He asked. He vaguely remembered James talking about it a few days ago, trying to figure out what song he wanted to use.

James shrugged as he plugged the heating pad in and brushed some of Fenris’ hair off his face. “I can miss it. We all know I’m gonna get a call back anyway.” 

That brought a frown to Fenris’ face. It was one thing if he missed a day of work. He was one of the best electricians in the city, speaking modestly, and he could rely on Josephine to hire him seasonally anyway. Acting was a much more fickle business and James needed to stay on top of things, to never give up his edge. 

Not to mention the fact that James Hawke, darling of Skyhold and the rising star of the theatre community, was transgender. It didn’t matter that he was six foot six and built like a tank or that women, men, and others all loved him. Casting directors still found something _off_ as they would say. It was frustrating to say the least, not to mention transphobic but James kept most of his digs to passive-aggressive comments. Fenris knew James had joked about growing a beard to be more masculine or cutting his hair, but thankfully he hadn’t gone through with either. 

The fake beard for _Champion_ had been horrific enough.

“I do not need you coddling,” Fenris reminded him. “I lived with this for years. You can go. I will be fine.” 

“That’s not the point. I want to take care of you,” James argued. 

Even though Fenris rolled his eyes, he couldn’t help but be touched. He still placed a hand on James’ cheek and said, “I know,” before pushing his boyfriend back as the kettle began singing.

“I’m going to get that but we aren’t done talking,” James said. Fenris was entirely unsurprised and remained silent as his loving and caring and absolutely wonderful and dream worthy boyfriend left. 

_Stubborn ass,_ Fenris thought.

He sent a quick text to Feynriel, telling him that the crew would be one short. The kid was a bit annoying sometimes but he was also the only other elf on the crew and Fenris couldn’t help but feel a little responsible for him. 

A quick call to the head electrician on the job and Fenris was officially off work by the time James returned. He smiled when Fenris told him and handed him the cup of tea. It was in Fenris’ favorite mug, a black one with _electricians light your world_ on it in white. 

“Are the pills helping?” James asked. Fenris shrugged as he sipped at the hot tea. Anything he did mostly made the pain bearable, not _better._ “I’ll call the casting director now. She’s the one who did _Bye, Bye Qunari,_ I’m fine.” 

Fenris snorted. That musical was a high school favorite despite the fact that most Qunari avoided musical theatre as against their philosophy unless it included plenty of platitudes to the Arishok and how good order was. Still, it sometimes had a revival and James had been part of the last one. Fenris had seen the footage and it was… definitely an _older_ performance. 

“It will take less than two hours for you to go and come back. You should go,” Fenris urged. “I promise to stay and laze.” 

“You deserve a chance to be lazy,” James agreed. “And really, I just want an excuse to lie in bed next to my hot boyfriend.” He flopped dramatically on the bed next to Fenris, who was rolling his eyes so hard it was a miracle they didn’t roll out of his face. “Is today a shot day or is it tomorrow?” James asked, resting his head on Fenris’ shoulder. He was much taller and his feet dangled off the edge. Fenris, meanwhile, could barely reach the end if he stretched. 

“Tomorrow. Two years and you forget,” Fenris teased, smiling as the combination of warmth, meds, and tea brought his pain to normal levels. 

Well. Normal for him. 

“I have so much else to remember,” James protested. “Like where you’re ticklist and which of my puns you like the most.” 

“All of your puns are despicable,” Fenris lied. 

“Aw, I just know you think I’m a fine-apple.” James burst into laughter and Fenris groaned even as his smile grew. There was a moment of silence with Fenris just drinking tea, relishing in having his boyfriend by his side even if the circumstances were less than desirable. “You know, I’m glad Trinket is visiting his aunt. He’d want to help but he’d squish you and then I wouldn’t have a boyfriend anymore.” Sometimes their mabari needed to be out somewhere he could run -- that's why Trinket would visit Bethany, who lived somewhere with actual grass. 

“More puns and you won’t,” Fenris said with a smile. 

“Lies and slander. What would you do without my sense of humor in your life?” James asked, grinning up at Fenris.

An exaggerated shrug escaped Fenris and he waved at the air with his free hand. “Suffer alone, I suppose,” he said. 

James sat up so he was at eye level with Fenris, practically bracketing the elf with his arms. The still hot tea left steam that curled up and brushed against him, but he ignored it. “You are never going to have to suffer alone again,” James swore. 

It was still unusual, the sudden moments of intensity that James displayed. He made it clear early in their relationship that he was serious about them and Fenris wouldn’t allow for anything else, but it still caught him off guard. 

Fenris smiled and set the tea on the nightstand. That gave him both hands to place on James’ face, bringing him close for a simple, chaste kiss. Fenris closed his eyes and rest his forehead on James’ and just breathed. 

His legs were in pain, he was just an electrician trying not to snap at his co-workers and he had no future in big theatres -- people didn’t want short electricians who looked like twigs. He had emotional scars and mental health issues that even he didn’t like touching with a ten foot pole. There were a hundred and one reasons to not date him and Fenris would never blame someone for deciding they couldn’t do it, they couldn’t put themselves through everything to be with him. 

But James had one hundred and two _thousand_ reasons he loved Fenris, he said so every other day, and Fenris believed him. 

“Don’t go to your audition,” Fenris blurted. “Stay here.” _With me._

James smiled his golden smile. “Always.”

**Author's Note:**

>  _The Archon and I_ is a slightly dated musical about what happens when the Archon ends up having to spend time with a Dalish clan. Elves hate it and Tevinter loves it. Also, traditionally humans in fake ears play the elves but there's been a great dael of pushback about that in the last few years.
> 
>  _Bye, Bye Qunari_ is about an ex-Tamarassan who settled down in an unnamed Ferelden town many years ago and has grown to be a staple part of the community. When the Blight happens, a group of Grey Wardens come and attempt to conscript her. Cue mayhem and drama as the town attempts to keep their Qunari.
> 
> Yeah I might be putting too much thought into this AU.


End file.
